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Why do i feel so sad?

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 20 total)
  • Author
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  • #30318
    Andy
    Member

    Feeling really miserable at present, but don’t really know why :frown: Still losing weight albeit slowly now, but plased with what i have achieved so far. Don’t feel happy or see any enjoyment in anything i do. I am going away with my Mum & Sis next week for a few days to Ireland for my Mum’s 60th, was looking forward to it, but now can’t be bothered. Perhaps i just need a slap to pull myself together. Sorry to moan but don’t really know what to do at present, feel like shutting myself in a room and never coming out.:noidea:

    #38510
    Precious
    Member

    Awww, Andy, we all feel like that from time to time, especially us women, we can be such emotional creatures!! I know that this whole journey is a emotional rollercoaster, even as far out as you are now!
    Pack your case, and go and have a bloody good weekend away. You will all have a great time together, I am sure.
    I am sending you big hugs hunni
    :hug: :kiss:

    xxxxx

    #38503
    monkey girl
    Member

    Hiya Andy, I am sorry you are feeling so low at the moment. I wonder if its the fact that you have been feeling on a high since the op, and many of us did experience that in the early days. You have gone through huge changes in the past few months and I remember being so relieved to have actually got through the procedure ,when the weight started coming off fast I was euphoric. Of course after a few months you become used to a lot of the changes and may now be faced with the reality that this is how you will eat more or less , for the rest of your life. Your emotions may be on a bit of a roller coaster ride for quite a while yet.
    Please try to be kind to your self and maybe even consider a chat with your gp or the team at streamline.
    I felt it was almost like coming to terms with a bereavement, after all for some of us food has often been our friend when times were tough and we no longer have that crutch to lean on. With time I hope this low will pass.
    I hope this helps, and of course you have your friends on the forum to lean on now too.
    take care
    Ruth

    #38513
    Brains
    Member

    Hiya Andy
    WE all feel like that at times I know I do. Sometimes we just have to go with our feelings and before you know it hopefully it has passed, and you think whooooa why did I feel like that!! I am sure you will have a wonderful hols. Take care hugs Annyx

    #38502
    mandyl
    Member

    hi andy
    pm me if u want a chat. as youll know if you read any of my posts on here,im going through the same right now. ill help or just listen anyway i can. big hugs and love . xxxxxx

    #38517
    Phoenix
    Member

    Hey Andy

    You’re not alone, hun…sometimes we don’t even need a reason it just is what it is! Ride with it, indulge yourself if need be but know that it won’t last…very soon you will want to be back amongst the living and ready to start strutting your stuff again. Remember to keep on celebrating your achievements and look forward to being with your family for your Mum’s special birthday… it’s ok, it really is – just proves that you are still human :hug:

    #38500
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Andy dumpling,
    Emotions….. they are a bugger sometimes, sad for no reason is to be a little expected.
    It such a relief to get through surgery and seeing the first results to make sure were not the one it wont work for…

    I went a but manic for a spell around 3 months out, I was snappy and rude.
    Told my senior manager to shove the works christmas pressents and was quite out of order, all for no reason just very emotional…..
    Thing is hun, you see it, or feel it so discussing it should help…
    Can you focus on anything in particular that makes you feel sad?u make the changes to avoid them…

    It is emotinal, its pretty natural, just talk, explain and be sure to ask for plenty of hugs and understanding….

    Hope you figure this out, realising their is something not quite perfect should have you looking into why it might be.

    Hopefully talking about it and realising your not alone will help…

    Pick yourself up…. ireland will be awesome…….
    I hear its very beautiful

    Take care

    Buzz xxx
    finding what gets to you will let yo

    #38501
    Claire
    Member

    Hi Andy

    Sorry to hear your feeling so low at the moment. I’ve been through a very tough 6 months with depression and other than the ADs from my GP, the best thing I have found to “pull me out of my funk” is to keep as busy as possible but with stuff you enjoy… Going out with friends and family, shopping, just generally being with people helps me.

    I don’t know your circumstances, but I live alone and when I want to hide from the world, it’s very easy to do, the only thing that stopped me staying under the duvet any longer than a weekend at a time was work. which luckily, I love too.

    A friend said the other day that depression is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign that you have been trying to be strong for too long. It’s true… The last couple of years for me, and probably most of us, have been really tough, with our weight, co-morbidities, funding stresses, waiting for surgery, etc, etc (and that doesn’t take into account any personal or work stress either)… now things are starting to get back on a bit more of an even keel, we are just emotionally exhausted and can no longer turn to our old “friend” food for comfort. We don’t have the emotional coping mechanisms that people who have never had issues with food have.

    Go and see your GP and have a chat. There is no shame in asking for help. In the meantime, please try to keep busy with fun stuff and remember, it does get better, I have had 3 of the best months of my life this summer, 9 months ago, I wouldn’t have thought that possible.

    Lots of love
    Claire
    xxx

    #38516
    Honey
    Member

    Andy

    How horrible to be feeling so low at the moment. The other people posting seem to have some ideas that may assist, I find sunlight (can be difficult to find I know, even in the summer) helpful, dividing the task of getting up when feeling low into segments, such as out from under duvet, let dog out, feed dog, put washing on, bathroom, dress etc makes it seem less daunting, and then I can mentally ‘tick off’ the steps I have achieved, and this can make me feel better. I also find walking helpful, I have a dog which helps, although as 3 weeks post-op I cannot walk our 30kg ultra-fit dog (how I envy the dog!) at present as she pulls on occasions (sighting of cats or rabbits usually) and at present I cannot quite manage that bit too well, but I will be able to soon.
    Friday is my ‘tricky’ day some weeks as I have the structure of a work day Mon-Thurs (and I really like my job which helps a lot), and Saturday and Sunday the two of us are home. I sometimes deliberately make dentist or other appts for Friday morning so I have to get going and organised, which is one of my ‘coping’ strategies. These things are terribly individual, but from all our ideas hopefully you might find something helpful.
    Do hope you feel able to go next week, and that the weather holds for you all.

    #38504
    Ms Ellie
    Member

    :hug::hug: Andy

    #38518
    kingfisher
    Member

    :grouphug:@Ms Ellie 7573 wrote:

    :hug::hug: Andy

    I do hope you are feeling better soon. Im sure you will feel a whole lot better after your holiday. Amazing weight loss by the way. x

    #38508
    SJ
    Member

    Sorry you are feeling so low. Not much to add to the others supportive words, but you are not alone, there is always a listening ear close by.

    I have also been through a really tough time, and we all know that the journey after weight loss surgery involves many highs and lows. I hope you feel brighter soon.

    SJ

    #38506
    Andy
    Member

    Thanks for all the positive comments. I am lucky that i really love my job, although i don’t like working for the NHS. I think a lot of you are right, the last year has been a rollercoaster of emotions, and i think i’m all emotioned out. I try and turn to food still then think oh bother (or words to that effect) i can’t eat that or do that, and food has always been my coping mechansim. I’m afraid of losing the plot altogether and the weight going back on, so feel flat, then miserable and turn into a horrible monster who shouts at her family, which makes me feel worse.

    I was on antidepressants a few years ago, and said i would never go back on them, but maybe i should speak to my Dr & see what she thinks. When i think logically i am really lucky, and should’nt have anything to be down about. I have a loving hubby who is very proud of me, two lovely kids (although one is a teenager) a good job friends & family who care. I do have moments when i feel really proud, but i still don’t see a thinner person, but i suppose theres that in all of us, its a shame they can’t do brain or emtion bypass’s when they do the wls, it would make life so much easier.

    I’m on leave for the next couple of weeks, so i’m going to take some me time, and think about what i want, and why i feel like this, because the only person to sort this out is me, and i haven’t been though all this to end up an emotional disaster who nobody whats to be around.

    Anyway thanks for all supporting me, you are a great bunch, and i’m sorry i didn’t get to speak to all of you last Saturday, hopefully at Xmas i won’t be as shy.

    Andy X

    #38515
    Maggie
    Member

    Andy, I’m very sorry you’re feeling down at present.
    I don’t know your situation, but what I can tell you is that most of us
    have eaten ourselves fat for a reason. I will share with you that in my
    case, it has been a lifetime of nastiness from my Mother. My grandparents
    (both from Scotland) were my rocks, and when I lost them, I started to eat
    my feelings. Unfortunately, although most of my excess weight left me, the
    lifetime of issues didn’t. What I found was that I needed some help. I don’t
    feel any shame in admitting that. I’m in therapy, and trying some antidepressant
    meds. In the end I thought to myself…I just did everything I could to address my
    physical health, and ignored my emotional health. I think in order to be successful
    in the long run, we all need to work on both. This may not be the case with you,
    and you may just be having a bit of down time, but I still thought I’d share my
    thoughts. Please take care, and post whenever you feel like withdrawing. There
    will always be someone here for you.

    Maggie

    #38505
    Ms Ellie
    Member

    Andy keep smiling xxxx
    Maggie great to have you back huni xxxx

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