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Viewing 15 posts - 16 through 30 (of 45 total)
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  • #54054
    Lauren
    Keymaster

    @Kimberly 33909 wrote:

    Oh my goodness I got to be honest but even writing this is difficult because for me as I tend to use denial a lot . Hiding from the truth . Ok I been making some stupid choices eating unhealthy food ( sweets crisp) and I need to stop , I put on two pound which I know considering that I eaten is not much . I’m worried I’m on the slippery slope . I feel so stupid when I know in my head how dangerouse it is for me to regain my weight .i can’t work out why I would sabotage myself . I was four pound off a normal bmi !!!!

    We have to give ourselves time. Lots of it. There is so much to learn. Some of it from the beginning but a great deal of it is revision. We all KNOW what we are supposed to do and not do, it’s the DOING it that’s the hard part.

    We are given the tool (wls) but we have to learn to become a craftsperson. That takes practice – lots of it. We will make mistakes – some of them over and over – but eventually we learn to use the tools to create amazing new things. We carve our a new future for ourselves. We just have to make sure that we carve it the right way.

    Don’t see it as failure but as a learning curve. If no one ever made mistakes, NOTHING would ever progress!

    Please don’t get caught up with the numbers Kim. They do not define you as a person. Be healthy. Be as good as you can about nourishing your body. If you slip up, give yourself a break, then start from the beginning again. It’s one path….health. That’s it. Not a size or a weight – it’s always about health. And living.

    You give so much to other people. I wish you could re direct some back to yourself more often.

    Be kind to yourself. Please 🙂

    Doodah x

    #54085
    bikerchris
    Participant

    Thanks for posting about that Kim.

    I’m no therapist and my opinions are only my own, but I do know about addiction (mine being food and alcohol). I believe all addictions are diseases of secrecy so by talking about the food you have eaten is a positive step.

    Its worth considering has something changed that would account for what you’re doing, for example are you stressed about something at home or work or your health or something. If you identify a problem you can arm yourself with a solution. I very much doubt you’re eating for the sake of it just to sabotage yourself

    Chris x

    #54091
    loulou19
    Member

    Sorry to hear you have been poorly Kimberley, glad you are getting sorted.

    Don’t beat yourself up over those ‘2lbs’. Look at how far you have come with your weight loss, its easy to be hard on ourselves – we all get things wrong at times, so look to the future and ignore those few days of naughtiness 😉

    I have loved seeing your photos on here – very inspirational

    xx

    #54073
    Kimberly
    Participant

    Thank you Loverly people . I’m working on it . It’s like this bloody nasty irritating voice that jump into my head and say sweets humbugs , black and liccorish ( think that how you spell it dyslexia ) crisps . And it continually pokes me . . I can’t think of what triggering it . I’m working on drinking more tea and found my home made ice lollies helpful . IM scared of reaching that normal BMI i don’t know how to do maintaining I only ever yo yo . So may be that’s it ? I really don’t know. I had at least three years of psychotherapy because of my work . I know loads about eating disorder and therapy . But knowing and living it is so different . I have to learn to live with uncomfortable impulses in my head I know the more I handle and manage them it will get better . I will be kind to my self because no one gets it right all the time . I just need to be honest with myself . So far out of five days I managed 4 sweet free so her to celebrating those four days x

    #54055
    Lauren
    Keymaster

    4/5 days is flippin brilliant. That’s 80%. Enough to get you an A* GCSE or a first class degree.

    One day at a time – and keep talking. We ALL totally understand. Maintaining is scary. The re introduction of certain foods can be terrifying.

    Trust yourself, your surgery, your team and those who love you. You are surrounded by people who want you to succeed. If anyone in your circle of support doesn’t want you to succeed, remove them. It’s very, very tough to do but you owe it to yourself.

    Put. Yourself. First. You deserve it and you have earned it.

    Doodah x

    #54092
    loulou19
    Member

    I really appreciate your honesty about your eating habits Kimberley (and everyone else’s honesty about things on here).

    Lets face it – none of us would be on here or had surgery if we were in complete control of what we ate, so I guess it must be scary coming so far and then maybe not reaching a target for the sake of some sweets. But in the big scheme of things you have done so well, and four days of being sweet free is no mean feat.

    If weight loss was just about eating less and not complicated by emotion and feelings we would all have been able to do it without surgery. I think you are entirely normal 🙂

    xx

    #54056
    Lauren
    Keymaster

    @loulou19 33940 wrote:

    I really appreciate your honesty about your eating habits Kimberley (and everyone else’s honesty about things on here).

    Lets face it – none of us would be on here or had surgery if we were in complete control of what we ate, so I guess it must be scary coming so far and then maybe not reaching a target for the sake of some sweets. But in the big scheme of things you have done so well, and four days of being sweet free is no mean feat.

    If weight loss was just about eating less and not complicated by emotion and feelings we would all have been able to do it without surgery. I think you are entirely normal 🙂

    xx

    You have hit the nail right on the head there Loulou. If we could control our portions/cravings, we wouldn’t even be on this forum! I sometimes think the most important part is not the level of success post wls, but about the effort put in to maintain it. If you lose 5st and stop, you are still 5st lighter so far better off than when you started.

    Weight loss can be addictive. We can get ‘high’ on the success. We get flattered, we are told we look great and that can easily become our primary focus. We all love to be told we look great but it shouldn’t be the ultimate goal. People have been known to then become addicted to cosmetic surgery in the search for the ‘perfect’ outward appearance. It doesn’t exist.

    So, do your best, follow the guidelines, seek support, enjoy all your victories (not just the wls related ones) and simply start over. Life is a cycle – but you can hop on at any time 😉

    Doodah x

    #54074
    Kimberly
    Participant

    Bless you xx one if the reassuring things is that I can be honest not judged . But also know you got my back xx you are such nice kind people

    #54057
    Lauren
    Keymaster

    @Kimberly 33985 wrote:

    Bless you xx one if the reassuring things is that I can be honest not judged . But also know you got my back xx you are such nice kind people

    There will never be any judgement here. I can promise you that much! I’m over the moon that you feel safe on here, Kim.

    When I took over this forum, there was sometimes nastiness and spite. And a sort of ‘competition’ as to who was either being the most virtuous or naughty. Or who was suffering the most. There were even people warning newbies about how awful wls can be.

    Whilst honest and constructive opinions are welcome – direct criticism is NOT. Nor do we try to scare the pants off newbies, just because we had problems. We tell the truth – our OWN truth. But we do not judge, belittle, scare or ‘bully’ people. Everyone is treated with respect.

    Nasty posts do occur, but they are swiftly dealt with. However, some of the older posts are still on here. I left them on as a reminder of how things SHOULDN’T be. There is no place for egos here.

    Anyway, I’ve gone off at a tangent – AGAIN! Make sure you all keep ME in check as I’m a a born gabber (Irish Mum haha!) and sometimes need reigning in. I love this place. It really is a little safety net of which every single one of you is holding a little bit. I have been supported so many times your bloomin arms must be aching!

    Doodah x

    #54075
    Kimberly
    Participant

    I’m so pleased today I went for annual asthma check out . I don’t want to go on about how poorly I was because you can read it here . So my BP was 112/72 on no blood pressure meds . Previously was 140/90 on two types of meds . I was nearly house bound with asthma and have been in resus . Thank you to my summers who not only did my bypas but found I had a hiatus hernia which he fixed . Since then I not used an inhaler , my peak flow was 400 it was 200 ..

    #54089
    Lelly
    Member

    @Kimberly 34020 wrote:

    I’m so pleased today I went for annual asthma check out . I don’t want to go on about how poorly I was because you can read it here . So my BP was 112/72 on no blood pressure meds . Previously was 140/90 on two types of meds . I was nearly house bound with asthma and have been in resus . Thank you to my summers who not only did my bypas but found I had a hiatus hernia which he fixed . Since then I not used an inhaler , my peak flow was 400 it was 200 ..

    Well done you Kimberly xx

    #54058
    Lauren
    Keymaster

    @Kimberly 34020 wrote:

    I’m so pleased today I went for annual asthma check out . I don’t want to go on about how poorly I was because you can read it here . So my BP was 112/72 on no blood pressure meds . Previously was 140/90 on two types of meds . I was nearly house bound with asthma and have been in resus . Thank you to my summers who not only did my bypas but found I had a hiatus hernia which he fixed . Since then I not used an inhaler , my peak flow was 400 it was 200 ..

    I can’t tell you how happy this news made me, Kim. What a life saving, life giving thing wls is.

    For people like you and I, it’s SO much more than the number on the scales or on the labels in our clothes. On a personal level, I’m very grateful to Shaw Somers too – we might never have met if he hadn’t performed your surgery!

    Doodah x

    #54081
    treeza
    Member

    Not sure I’ve ever seen any nastiness on here. Just kindness & compassion. Being truthful is also Important. At the being when I was struggling I thought it was only me & felt like a failure & on my own. Then I read & posted on here & realised that I wasn’t alone. We all travel our own journeys but often there are people who have experienced similar things & can offer help & advice.

    #54059
    Lauren
    Keymaster

    @treeza 34043 wrote:

    Not sure I’ve ever seen any nastiness on here. Just kindness & compassion. Being truthful is also Important. At the being when I was struggling I thought it was only me & felt like a failure & on my own. Then I read & posted on here & realised that I wasn’t alone. We all travel our own journeys but often there are people who have experienced similar things & can offer help & advice.

    That is such a good point, Treeza. Although we all travel our own journey, sometimes we take the same path. It’s so reassuring to know that someone else has had the same experience. I was totally clueless! Most of what I know about wls (which isn’t ever enough so always looking to learn new things) I learned from other patients.

    I was lucky enough to meet Joy, who was on ‘Fat Doctors’. She was so helpful. Really kind – spending time with me and explaining what it was REALLy like. Smashing girl. I will always be grateful to her.

    Doodah x

    #54076
    Kimberly
    Participant

    Seen on Tuesday by the team and discharge . The Baratric nurse was very good and reassuring , very happy with my weight loss was 20 stone aug2013 , now 9 stone 10 . BMI now 25 . She was so reassuring , advices not to lose any more as with the extra skim my bmi is probably lower. She also said in the future if I started to regain don’t sit at home worrying to give the team a ring . How good is that and so reassuring. What a fifference 19 month has made . From house bound woman waiting for the big heart attack . To living , laughing having a full life full of hope and expectations .

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