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Viewing 13 posts - 1 through 13 (of 13 total)
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  • #31631
    Daisy
    Member

    Hi everyone. I have spent the past few weeks reading all of your positive and very encouraging stories which have in many ways helped me – thank you. I’ve also googled “gastric bypass” quite a lot which maybe wasn’t such a good idea.

    My op is booked for Thursday but I already failed. I lasted 24 hours on the milk diet. I really don’t like milk, the taste and the feel of it in my mouth makes me heave, it took me 3 hours to drink one pint, the second pint I warmed up and put 4 expresso’s in it but I still struggled to drink it. So I went onto the other diet – it was either this or giving up completely. I’m now worried I’ve done more harm than good and I’m waiting to be told off by the surgeon…. maybe I just won’t say anything and hope he doesn’t notice (or read this).

    I have lots of support and encouragement from my family and my husband has been amazing and he has walked every step so far with me. But… I have such negative thoughts and really believe after my op (which needs to happen, I don’t really have a choice) my life will be over, I’m not even convinced I will even survive it. I’ve tried to talk myself around to think more positively but I can’t, I just slip back into thinking the very worst. I believe I will become isolated and housebound as I won’t want to go out and certainly won’t want to socialise. I believe I won’t feel human/normal (not that I feel normal now, but I do feel human). I feel like everything is being taken away from me and I have no idea how I’m going to cope. I’m dreading the thought of my hair falling out and any dignity I have left will be lost with (politely put) the “wind”… literally. I fear I will still constantly crave food and want to eat and more so because I won’t be able to. The need for this op wasn’t enough to give me the willpower to achieve loosing weight the normal route, but believe me I did try – you name it I tried it but I always ended up heavier than when I started.

    I’ve had some counselling which has helped and as said I have family support and encouragement but I have never in my life felt so alone and scared.

    #52938
    bikerchris
    Participant

    Hi Daisy

    I’m sorry to hear that you are struggling as you approach your surgery, but believe me, I do know exactly how you feel. In fact just reading your post brought back those feelings that I had before my surgery and this was just 3 months ago. I think I’ve never been so anxious and uncertain about anything in my life before. But we would not be human if we did not have some of these feeling, we are about to undertake a life changing step. Life changing for the better that is.

    I see that you are struggling with the milk diet and this is one part of your post that I don’t identify with, I was able to tolerate that well. I see you mention doing another diet pre-op and I don’t know what that is. I can only recommend being fully honest with your surgeon, if he has all the facts, he’ll be able to do his best for you.

    I think it is normal to think of our own mortality too when undergoing surgery, after all the risks are spelled out to us before hand. I also considered the Catch 22 where having a BMI of 45 meant I was not the healthiest person and so not an ideal candidate for general anaesthetic, but then if I wasn’t morbidly obese, I wouldn’t need the surgery. I tried as hard as I could to focus on the fact that I was putting my faith in I very highly skilled team who would take care of me.

    Once you get past the surgery, that is the beginning of a happier and healthier you. Please believe me when I tell you my only regret is not having the surgery sooner. Many others who post on this forum will tell you the same thing. All I have done is abide by 2 simple rules, I’ve done exactly what I was told with my food and I took exercise.. If you have time, get a variety of pureed food ready and frozen in small portions now so it is ready for you when you come home.

    Within a very short time, I started to get the good stuff out of my surgery. I’ve lost 4 and a half stone in weight, not only can I now walk much better but I can now walk uphill and no longer are all my clothes from a certain high street shop with which we are all familiar. I have managed to eat out and go away for the weekend, these things do take a bit of planning but it is possible and enjoyable

    #52939
    bikerchris
    Participant

    Hi Daisy

    I’m sorry to hear that you are struggling as you approach your surgery, but believe me, I do know exactly how you feel. In fact just reading your post brought back those feelings that I had before my surgery and this was just 3 months ago. I think I’ve never been so anxious and uncertain about anything in my life before. But we would not be human if we did not have some of these feeling, we are about to undertake a life changing step. Life changing for the better that is.

    I see that you are struggling with the milk diet and this is one part of your post that I don’t identify with, I was able to tolerate that well. I see you mention doing another diet pre-op and I don’t know what that is. I can only recommend being fully honest with your surgeon, if he has all the facts, he’ll be able to do his best for you.

    I think it is normal to think of our own mortality too when undergoing surgery, after all the risks are spelled out to us before hand. I also considered the Catch 22 where having a BMI of 45 meant I was not the healthiest person and so not an ideal candidate for general anaesthetic, but then if I wasn’t morbidly obese, I wouldn’t need the surgery. I tried as hard as I could to focus on the fact that I was putting my faith in I very highly skilled team who would take care of me.

    Once you get past the surgery, that is the beginning of a happier and healthier you. Please believe me when I tell you my only regret is not having the surgery sooner. Many others who post on this forum will tell you the same thing. All I have done is abide by 2 simple rules, I’ve done exactly what I was told with my food and I took exercise.. If you have time, get a variety of pureed food ready and frozen in small portions now so it is ready for you when you come home.

    Within a very short time, I started to get the good stuff out of my surgery. I’ve lost 4 and a half stone in weight, not only can I now walk much better but I can now walk uphill and no longer are all my clothes from a certain high street shop with which we are all familiar. I have managed to eat out and go away for the weekend, these things do take a bit of planning but it is possible and enjoyable. My next thing is planning a camping holiday, something I could not have considered a few months ago.

    With regard to the other stuff, I’ve not noticed my hair falling out, not have I noticed excessive wind. But even if I did, these are better than diabetes, heart disease, needing joint replacement or even dying prematurely as a result of obesity.

    You go girl! And I can’t wait to hear from you after your surgery as you begin your new life.

    Chris xx

    #52935
    Kimberly
    Participant

    Daisy . I’m so sorry you are having a hard time at the moment . Your fears prior to weight loss surgery are really common , I can only speak for my self , I’m 8 month bypass and it has changed my life . I have a richer social life I’m so much more healthier than I was before surgery . When my family go out for meals I’m a cheep date , I either have a starter , or I pick bits off my husband plate (naughty) . Every Wednesday we meet up with friends for a pub quiz my husband loves it as I only drink water or tea . I have so much energy now and regularly exercise at the gym , I can also do long walks in the country . When I’m with friends out for a meal I don’t mind about the food it’s the people and company I enjoy so I have ordered a meal and left most of it but probably spent most of the time talking and laughing. I now eat to live rather live to eat. I know that with out this surgery I would have been dead , the years of yo yo dieting just was too much for my little old heart and I so wish I had done this earlier., also house bound .I can personally say that streamline really do have our best interest and I know it was really upsetting when they failed me on the anesthetist appointment because I was a too high risk and wanted me to see a cardiologist and a cardiac surgeon , however I can now look back and see that they were doing a brilliant job looking after me even though I cried for weeks when I was refused , I suppose I’m telling you this to reassure you howserious they take our health .
    As for the milk diet I found the Baratric megastore sugar free syrup was brilliant and had lots of bannan milk shakes and milky coffee. In fact I still use the syrups in milky coffee now and also flavour fat free Greek yogurts .
    I don’t know if this is helpful , but I wish you all the best in what ever decision you choose

    #52936
    treeza
    Member

    Hi Daisy please be kind to yourself honey. It’s is normal to be anxious before having surgery everyone is. I’d be more concerned if you weren’t. You have obviously put a lot of research into the operation which is a great start. I think if you look back on all our journeys most of us posted a similar message to yours.
    My only regret is not having the surgery sooner. It’s opened my life back up! I’ve done things I haven’t be able to do for years! As far as the milk diet goes pls don’t beat yourself up for not being able to do the milk diet there are many who can’t. I say well done for trying it especially when you hate milk. They tell you about the other one just for that reason. I would tell your team which diet you followed just so they know. Some people get windy (I am :0)) but Chris is right what’s a bit of wind compared to heart disease, hypertension, stroke, diabetic etc?
    All I ask is you try think of the positive honey. Be kind to yourself you deserve it for making such a life changing & life giving (stole that from the streamline video!) decision. Doodah maybe you could post the link for it please. It always keeps me positive. Everyone on it are so inspirational including our lovely Doodah! :0)
    Come on the forums & also see if there’s a group meeting near you & go meet others who have had WLS. Where do you live Hun?
    Sending a great big reassuring hug x x x

    #52930
    Lauren
    Keymaster

    @Daisy 32453 wrote:

    Hi everyone. I have spent the past few weeks reading all of your positive and very encouraging stories which have in many ways helped me – thank you. I’ve also googled “gastric bypass” quite a lot which maybe wasn’t such a good idea.

    My op is booked for Thursday but I already failed. I lasted 24 hours on the milk diet. I really don’t like milk, the taste and the feel of it in my mouth makes me heave, it took me 3 hours to drink one pint, the second pint I warmed up and put 4 expresso’s in it but I still struggled to drink it. So I went onto the other diet – it was either this or giving up completely. I’m now worried I’ve done more harm than good and I’m waiting to be told off by the surgeon…. maybe I just won’t say anything and hope he doesn’t notice (or read this).

    I have lots of support and encouragement from my family and my husband has been amazing and he has walked every step so far with me. But… I have such negative thoughts and really believe after my op (which needs to happen, I don’t really have a choice) my life will be over, I’m not even convinced I will even survive it. I’ve tried to talk myself around to think more positively but I can’t, I just slip back into thinking the very worst. I believe I will become isolated and housebound as I won’t want to go out and certainly won’t want to socialise. I believe I won’t feel human/normal (not that I feel normal now, but I do feel human). I feel like everything is being taken away from me and I have no idea how I’m going to cope. I’m dreading the thought of my hair falling out and any dignity I have left will be lost with (politely put) the “wind”… literally. I fear I will still constantly crave food and want to eat and more so because I won’t be able to. The need for this op wasn’t enough to give me the willpower to achieve loosing weight the normal route, but believe me I did try – you name it I tried it but I always ended up heavier than when I started.

    I’ve had some counselling which has helped and as said I have family support and encouragement but I have never in my life felt so alone and scared.

    Hi Daisy

    Firstly, can I tell you that I am actually pleased that you are thinking about all of this so much, even if it is negatively? It proves that you have seriously considered all the pros and cons and are not going to be fooled into thinking that it will all be a walk in the park. Doubts are healthy!

    OK, so you are worried about how much your life will change. You are right to do that! What you are wrong about is that all the changes will be negative ones. Yes, you won’t be able to turn to food for comfort like you used to and yes, you will have wind in the beginning. But, what you WILL have is a happier, healthier and longer life. A life where you will be able to make all the choices, not just the ones you are left with after considering your obesity.

    You will be able to travel comfortably, go to the theatre or cinema without worrying about the seat width, take up cycling (should you want to) or even walk for miles. Once this all starts happening, you will be surprised at how much you need food less and less to be your comfort zone. The fact that you have had counselling also helps in the long term (I had three years of therapy) and will mean that you will have a frame of reference for why you did all the comfort eating in the first place (if that is how you put the weight on in the beginning.)

    You are not alone. You have your family and friends, us folk on here and the clinical team behind you. Your hand will be metaphorically held by us all in the early days. It’s like having stabilisers on a bike – you will eventually be able to remove them and go on your merry way. We have all felt exactly the same as you do now to a lesser or greater extent.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efQEsUp0NVA

    This is the Video we made with real patients – I’m the first person to speak on the video and some of the other lovely people on it have become dear friends. Believe me, you will make some friends for life through this whole journey.

    As for the milk diet problem – forget it. You tried it, it didn’t work and you were given an alternative. Move on. None of us are perfect and we are all different. I LOVED the milk diet and I still love milk now!

    If possible, try to find a support group near you. They are such a comfort. I don’t know what I would have done without my support group friends these past month, as it ends up that we need each other for far more than just the surgery.

    You are right to have doubts but Try not to let them overwhelm you. Every single one of us on here will have felt how you feel at some point. Trust your surgeon, the surgery and yourself for the best results. Ask for help when you need it and be kind to yourself. Like I say on the video – put yourself first for once!

    I get excited for everyone who is about to embark on this journey. I have seen many, many people freed from the prison of their obesity and go on to do absolutely amazing things – start new jobs, run marathons, travel the world and find true happiness. But the best gift of all is a future. One over which they have control. That will be YOU soon!

    Doodah x

    #52933
    Whitey
    Member

    Hi Daisy sorry to hear you are feeling so low. Don’t think you are a failure because you can’t stomach the milk diet. Speak to your team I think there is a low carb diet you can do instead. As everyone has said it’s normal to have worries and concerns but I would try to think of it as a great opportunity to restart your life. Yes there are risks and some issues with wind & hairloss (don’t worry you will not go bald!). But these are far outweighed by all the new things you can do.
    Everyone on here understands and is here to help with any questions you have. Good luck with everything and look forward to you new life Elaine x

    #52931
    Lauren
    Keymaster

    Hi Daisy

    How are you feeling today?

    Doodah x

    #52941
    Daisy
    Member

    Hello lovey ladies. Thank you very much for your kind words and support, they are very much appreciated. I’m ready (well by ready I mean I’ve packed my bag). We are travelling down to Chichester this evening as I live in Bristol. I’m still feeling scared and unsure this is the right thing to do and all will be ok. Hopefully I have just made a couple of new friends that along with my family will say “I told you it would be ok”…. I’ll come back next week to let you know how it all went for me. Xx

    #52937
    treeza
    Member

    Safe journeys Hun x see you on the other side. We are shifting up the losers bench & will be waiting to welcome you x

    #52940
    bikerchris
    Participant

    Will be thinking of you tomorrow. Can’t wait to hear from you once you’re ‘done’.

    Chris x

    #52934
    Whitey
    Member

    Good luck we look forward to hearing from you x

    #52932
    Lauren
    Keymaster

    Good luck today Daisy. Can’t wait to hear all about it. We will all budge up on the losers bench for you.

    Doodah xx

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