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Finally have my money so what is next…?

Home » Topics » Surgical Journey » Pre- Weight Loss Surgery » Finally have my money so what is next…?

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 19 total)
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    Posts
  • #30685
    shelleymarie
    Member

    Hi All, Hope you are well. I’ve been here on and off (mainly off as it been a difficult wait) but I’ve finally got my inheritance and I’ve rang to get the ball rolling (at St.Richards), I was told that someone would get back to me at the end of last week, they didn’t so I rang again and they said that hopefully some one will get back to me this week, apparently there has been a delay/catch up, not sure what is meant by that. Anyway I’m not worried a few more weeks here and there now, it’s been so long that I can cope with that but I’m actually not sure what I’m waiting for. I’m not very good on the phone so didn’t really get the gist of it but for those who are none nhs patients, what happened after you rang to get things started? (I’ve had my initial consultation with the surgeon who supports the idea I should have the bypass) Is it finance that get in touch? or someone else? I know it may sound silly for not asking but like I say I’m rubbish on the phone so didn’t really ask what I’m waiting for next…?!

    Anyway I’m a bit closer now, a lot closer than I was a year ago (think I could’ve had it done on the nhs in this time but oh well) and that is both exciting and scary. I’m also having to deal with a lot of friends and family coming up with all sorts of schemes that would “save me” and prevent the surgery. One even sent me a link to an article where a poor lady passed away due to complications post op. Unfortunately I’ve come to the end of my tether trying to explain my situation and what I know is for the best now, so it is harder to fight them off. Any tips? I should have kept it a secret but I’m very open in general which seems to be a bit of downfall at the moment but hopefully that will help in the long run when I’ll really need the support.

    Anyway that is my update. Hopefully next time I can start to talk about dates and things, we will see. If anyone can answer my questions I would be very grateful. Thanks 🙂

    #43583
    luckyflower
    Member

    Hi,
    Well I went to Harrow once I rang for appointment saw Consultant and agreed on surgery and booked the day then. It was a date suitable for me to fit in with holidays. They contacted me for pre op and also sent invoice few weeks before. Hope this helps.
    As for fielding off inappropriate comments I have only told husband, mother and sister what I have done. I think you just need to firmly but politely say you have considered the options and this is your decision.

    This is the best thing i have done, i did not go into it lightly as have two young children. Today I ran with my child in the snow and played for an hour, last year i was worn out after ten mins. I have lost 5 stone 3 pound in nearly 4 months. So happy today, being able to join in is what it is all about.

    All the best to you!

    #43586
    shelleymarie
    Member

    Thanks so much luckyflower. That is really helpful. Yes I think I should be a little stronger and just tell people thanks but the decision is made.

    So happy to hear of your fun in the snow. A big dream of mine. Fantastic. Well done on the 5 stone 3 pound so far! that is great. Next snow day your kids will be wanting to go home before you 😀

    thanks 🙂

    #43577
    Doodah
    Keymaster

    @shelleymarie 21657 wrote:

    Hi All, Hope you are well. I’ve been here on and off (mainly off as it been a difficult wait) but I’ve finally got my inheritance and I’ve rang to get the ball rolling (at St.Richards), I was told that someone would get back to me at the end of last week, they didn’t so I rang again and they said that hopefully some one will get back to me this week, apparently there has been a delay/catch up, not sure what is meant by that. Anyway I’m not worried a few more weeks here and there now, it’s been so long that I can cope with that but I’m actually not sure what I’m waiting for. I’m not very good on the phone so didn’t really get the gist of it but for those who are none nhs patients, what happened after you rang to get things started? (I’ve had my initial consultation with the surgeon who supports the idea I should have the bypass) Is it finance that get in touch? or someone else? I know it may sound silly for not asking but like I say I’m rubbish on the phone so didn’t really ask what I’m waiting for next…?!

    Anyway I’m a bit closer now, a lot closer than I was a year ago (think I could’ve had it done on the nhs in this time but oh well) and that is both exciting and scary. I’m also having to deal with a lot of friends and family coming up with all sorts of schemes that would “save me” and prevent the surgery. One even sent me a link to an article where a poor lady passed away due to complications post op. Unfortunately I’ve come to the end of my tether trying to explain my situation and what I know is for the best now, so it is harder to fight them off. Any tips? I should have kept it a secret but I’m very open in general which seems to be a bit of downfall at the moment but hopefully that will help in the long run when I’ll really need the support.

    Anyway that is my update. Hopefully next time I can start to talk about dates and things, we will see. If anyone can answer my questions I would be very grateful. Thanks 🙂

    Hi Shelley.

    Would your friends and family be so concerned by your decisions if you were having heart surgery? You are having an operation which will give you a longer, healthier and happier life! It’s absolutely no-one else’s business anyway! Sorry but I’m really cross on your behalf!! Hold your head high and know you are doing this to make YOUR life better, not theirs.

    Doodah x

    ps sorry to be so outspoken but I’m on your side 100% lol!

    #43582
    hazelann70
    Member

    Here here Doodah!!! I’ve always been able to tell people about what I am having done and what I’ve had done. I’m afraid I’ve been of the mind that if they don’t like it then they can lump it. It’s our lives and it’s us who decides what we do with it. When we have suffered all our lives with this problem and nothing has worked then why shouldn’t we have some help? If there was a miracle cure then I think the world would know about it. I remember before my band in 2001 there was a lady who I knew who was really huge and she tried telling me the new diet she was on was what I needed etc. I had my band and about a year later, she was on the band list too! Bless her for trying though. People mean well but it’s usually those people who have never had a weight problem in their lives who try to give advise (ok the lady I said about was different). All of us have got to the stage where if diets were going to work, they would have done us proud years ago. I take my hat off to those who they do work for but alas, in most cases you only have to look a few years down the line and they are back to square one. Mind you, it’s really no different to bypass if you’re stupid like me!!! lmao

    #43575
    Doodah
    Keymaster

    Agree with you 100% Hazel. If diets work, why is there a multi billion pound diet industry? Surely you would only need it the once?!

    Doodah x

    #43588
    shelleymarie
    Member

    Thanks doodah and hazel, you words of encouragement and support are so important. I’m really grateful. Everything you say is true. I’ve often had people say just think what you can do with the money if I didn’t have the surgery. It’s kind of funny really because I live with my mother who is my full time carer and I get out one day a week at most to go to the vets I volunteer at. I use to so much there but now I sit on reception but I want to be a vet nurse! And I’ll never do that in this condition so yeah my point is that I could put the money away but what on earth would I spend it on if I can’t go on holiday, back to college or live alone etc… At least I have a shot at a future this way.

    Anyway sorry for rambling I’m typing on my phone so just getting use to it.

    Still not heard from the hospital so Will give them a ring again tomorrow. Time to get this show on the road! Lol

    thanks again xx

    #43579
    Doodah
    Keymaster

    @shelleymarie 21756 wrote:

    Thanks doodah and hazel, you words of encouragement and support are so important. I’m really grateful. Everything you say is true. I’ve often had people say just think what you can do with the money if I didn’t have the surgery. It’s kind of funny really because I live with my mother who is my full time carer and I get out one day a week at most to go to the vets I volunteer at. I use to so much there but now I sit on reception but I want to be a vet nurse! And I’ll never do that in this condition so yeah my point is that I could put the money away but what on earth would I spend it on if I can’t go on holiday, back to college or live alone etc… At least I have a shot at a future this way.

    Anyway sorry for rambling I’m typing on my phone so just getting use to it.

    Still not heard from the hospital so Will give them a ring again tomorrow. Time to get this show on the road! Lol

    thanks again xx

    As someone else said ‘…it’s an investment in my future….’ You actually could fulfill a dream: becomming a vet nurse (I’m so jealous of your voluntary work: if I only had the time…)

    Go for it. Remember ‘If’ is only half of life. Like you say, you have a shot at the future you want and the chance to be the person you want to be.

    Doodah x

    #43587
    shelleymarie
    Member

    Feeling really disheartened at the moment and can’t sleep. I’ve tried to arrange my bypass/get things going for several weeks now and I’m getting no where. I’ve got the money sitting in the bank, I’ve spent well over a year making sure this what I want, when I saw Mr. Slater he was supportive, my GP is supportive but my phone calls don’t seem to be getting me anywhere. I can’t seem to get things off the ground and that doesn’t seem normal. Today I had a very stressful phone call about it all (probably stressful because I’m quite stressed at the moment. Especially knowing I’ve gained weight in all this waiting. Obviously not what I want to be doing). I also keep getting asked why I’m not going nhs, I wish I had applied a year ago but I didn’t have a supportive GP, I do now but now I feel if I apply now I will have to wait even longer and I just don’t know I have any more strength for this part of the journey. I want to save my energy and use what I have left for losing weight and learning a new way of life. Anyway I just need to vent. I’ve been promised a phone call back and this time they seemed like they meant it so hopefully I’ll know more soon.

    Sorry for all the vent/help needed posts. I promise whenever I finally join the losers bench and hopefully have some experience I will pay back all the help and support I’ve been given on these boards. I know I wouldn’t of made it this far and be determined to for fight for what I want without all your help.
    Thank you

    #43578
    Doodah
    Keymaster

    Hi Shelley.

    Firstly you do NOT ever need to apologise for venting on here – it’s what it’s for! We are all in the same boat, just at different stages of our journies. Please don’t think you are required to ‘pay back’ anything. What you might not realise at the moment is that in the future, someone will read your posts and think ‘She knows exactly how I feel: what did she do?’ so you will be helping people without even realising it!

    Who is being less than forthcoming with the phoncalls? As for the weight gain, it’s the reason you need help so don’t beat yourself up over it. I know it sounds like a hacknied old cliche but positive thinking creates postive happenings so try to make sure you get a good night’s sleep, keep as healthy as possible and let everyone see that you mean business.

    Please let us know how you get on.

    Doodah x

    #43589
    shelleymarie
    Member

    Thanks so much for the reassurance, I do hope my posts and questions can help someone down the line as I read over other posts all the time and it really helps.
    The phone call thing hasn’t helped or got any easier. I hope what I say doesn’t come across wrong but because I’m planning on spending every single penny of what I have and my inheritance on this operation and I’ve not had a good response, it is making me worry about everything. I know I want Mr. Slater or one of the wonderful surgeons working with streamline. I’m feeling awkward about talking about it but every time I’ve spoke streamline it has been very good, but speaking to the hospital (Chichester) I’ve not got a good or positive response and I’ve still not got a phone call back after weeks. I think I’ve said I’m rubbish on the phone before so maybe not making myself clear but I feel like I’m here and ready but I don’t know what to do next and I’m certainly not getting any response from the people I thought I would. No response at all. Any advice?

    I will definitely let you know what happens next. Thanks so much for the reassurance and incredible support Doodah, you really are so helpful 🙂

    #43574
    Doodah
    Keymaster

    Aw, thanks Shelley. I’ve been where you are and I know how upsetting it can be to want to get started with a plan and it not going exactly according to that plan. Leave it with me. I will ask my colleagues your best, next course of action 😉

    Doodah x

    #43584
    shelleymarie
    Member

    Thank you very much. I really appreciate that.

    x

    #43591
    charabanc
    Member

    Hi Shelleymarie,

    Been following this thread and wondered how you are progressing?
    It is a minefield to navigate, but I am sure you will get there in the end, just stay positive.

    Regards.

    #43580
    Doodah
    Keymaster

    Hi Shelley, how are things with you? Have you been contacted yet?

    Doodah xx

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