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Re: The Turning Point

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@bikerchris 32794 wrote:

Hi All,

I just wanted to take some time to post about the event that finally put me on the path to weight loss surgery, my turning point. This was one year ago tomorrow and it was the death of my Father. Now I do believe that the death of a parent makes you think about your own mortality like nothing else can, but my experience was rather different. It isn’t as though my Dad died of anything obesity related. He was a burly ex-rugby player who probably carried a stone or two that he shouldn’t but he died of cancer, In fact looking at my family, most members carry a stone or two that they shouldn’t, except me who was carrying an extra 10 stones!

The reason his death put me on this path is because of the amount of self obsession that I went through in the days and weeks that followed. I had to deal with official matters in person with banks, solicitors, funeral directors etc and I found this very difficult as I was used to only appearing in public with people I knew. Then there was also the funeral where I had to meet family and friends and all I could think of was what can I possible wear and what will people think of me. During the time that should have been dedicated to the memory of my Dad and offering support to my Mum, all I could think of was myself.

I consider myself fortunate because, although I’d been knocked back by the NHS for wls some years ago, at the time I was working for a company whose health care scheme offered a co-pay scheme where I could pay 25% of the retail cost of my bypass and they paid the rest. Streamline are their supplier and this is why I have to schlep to Harrow when I live near Manchester. I went for a consultation in February and had my op in April and the rest is history. My weight loss is just over 8 stone, I’m finding my loss is very slow now and I have to work hard for it but I feel like a new woman in every way, health, appearance, confidence and personality. And I spend much less time obsessing about myself. I am sorry that my Dad isn’t here to witness my success, I know how much he was concerned for me. But the rest of my family are so pleased for me and I know they are far less worried for me than they used to be.

This post is not intended to be morbid by talking about death, rather it feels joyful that my wonderful new life sprang from this.

Chris x

Hi Chris, thank you so much for sharing this deeply personal and candid post with us.

Without breaking confidentiality, I can tell you that you are most certainly not alone in making your decision after the death of a very close friend or family member. It seems to compound everything and give us strength just when we need it the most – as if the person who has passed away gives it to us.

I’m also pleased that you feel you could share it with us. It’s great to have somewhere where almost everyone will understand how you feel or have felt in the past.

Doodah x

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