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Re: Needing, and asking for help.

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#54095
Lelly
Member

@Doodah 33865 wrote:

Hello my lovelies.

I hope you are all tickety boo this morning.

I wanted to raise the topic of needing, and asking for, help.

I have said it many times and still believe it 100% that, asking for help is one of the hardest things to do in life.

I have recently needed to reach out for much more support than I ‘normally’ need and found it to be incredibly difficult to make that first step. However, after doing so, I felt like the weight of the world had lifted off my shoulders. I needed nothing physical or even tangible – merely to be heard and supported. As many of you may know, my family have been through some pretty dark times this past three years and I have tried to remain strong to limit the damage to the people I love. In doing so, I soaked it all up. My stress, fear and sense of worth (because I was powerless) built and built until it started to affect me physically.

I reached tipping point. So, I turned to the people I knew would understand exactly how hard it is not to turn to food when your life spirals out of control: My fellow support group members. They have been such a tower of strength that it almost defies description. Whatever I have felt – they understood! Simply having an outlet eased the pressure and I am finally, after three years of hospitals, chemo suites, worry and emotional pain, I can slowly start to re build myself. My family went through the terrible times but I felt every moment of it with them – how the frilly heck did I think it wasn’t going to affect me?!

I am known as the calm one in my family. I listen, observe then make plans. The only problem is, that when a loved one (two loved ones in my case) is facing the fight of (and for) their lives, how do you plan for anything? Anyway, I did my best and have been told it was good enough. It has made us such a tight knit family now that in some unexplainable way, it has made us all even closer. BUT – I didn’t feel I could then burden them with my own feelings. that’s where the support of people like you guys comes in.

I will never be able to thank you enough. You asked for nothing in return and I will be eternally grateful. SO, if you are struggling and you think you are alone, PLEASE ask for help. I know how difficult it is, but I also know that it will be worth it. Help doesn’t always mean the physical kind. The physical merits of emotional support cannot be overestimated. Just knowing that someone else REALLY cares, and always will, is one of the biggest prizes in life.

So – if any of you need help – ask. Pluck up the courage, be kind to yourself and ask for support and help. Yes, you are opening up your soul/spirit to others, but, what you are actually doing is asking them to help you heal it yourself. By doing so, you will be learning one of life’s most valuable lessons: Love yourself. Love yourself as much as you love others.

You have my unending gratitude.

Doodah x

I am so sorry, I did not know that you were going through such turmoil, pressure, pain and fear and you still had time for our petty concerns, you are quite a lady and I am so pleased that you allowed friends to support you.
Much love
Lelly xx

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